The GROW Model in Four Steps: A Manager’s Guide to Better Coaching Conversations

It is far too common for coaches to tell people what they should do. The GROW model offers a better way: a simple, practical framework that helps managers guide a conversation until the coachee is the one saying, “this is what I will do.” Created by Sir John Whitmore and his colleagues around 1980, the GROW model is used in conversations, meetings, and everyday leadership interactions to help unlock the potential of the people you lead.

At its heart, the core GROW conversation is simple: first expand, then focus. You expand by using your inquiry skills to uncover the options available to the coachee, then you focus on what they can practically take on. GROW stands for Goal, Reality, Options, and Will. Here is how a manager can work through each step.

Step 1: Goal – Decide Where You’re Headed

Start by identifying the goal or challenge. It might be a difficulty at work, an issue to resolve, a target to meet, or a stretch goal for someone who is already doing well but could do better. Whatever it is, keep it practical.

Useful goal questions include:

• What do you want to achieve, and why do you want to achieve it?
• What is your time frame?
• Which part of that is the real focus?
• How will you know when you have achieved it?

A person may have many goals, so help them focus on what is practical and achievable in the shorter term. Once a coachee has experienced success, they can move on to loftier goals. Ask them to define what success means to them, so they know where to concentrate now and what it looks like when they get there.

Step 2: Reality – Start with the Now

Reality is the coachee’s current situation at that point in time. This is where people get clear about where they are, what is happening, and how it is affecting them, and it is a chance for reflective learning. More often than not, managers talk about the past and the future and very seldom about the now, yet the now is very important in achieving the future.

Useful reality questions include:

• What is currently happening, and how does it affect you?
• What work have you done so far, not just on the challenges, but on what is going well?
• What is helping you achieve your goal?
• What is getting in the way of your goal?

Follow up by asking what insights they gained from this assessment, what they learned about themselves, and how they can use the results to reach their goal. Take time to stay in reality mode. It is how you end up with better options.

Step 3: Options – Expand Before You Choose

Coaches tend to move toward options before they have finished the reality stage. When reality has been explored properly, the conversation can become deeper and lighter in tone, because now both of you are problem-solving.

Useful option questions include:

• What are your options? What actions are available to you?
• What has worked for you in the past, and can it apply now?
• What support is available for these actions, and how easy is it to get?
• Where can you gather more information about the issue?

List as many options as possible and brainstorm on them. Do not shoot any option down until you have processed it. By not limiting the options, you can discuss items that you might not have thought of on your own.

Step 4: Will – Turn Options into Commitment

Will, or the way forward, is the next step the coachee must take. It is one step beyond options, because now you choose the option that will work best. It is also the most important step of the four. Until the coachee himself or herself says, “this is what I will do,” the action required to reach the goal is unlikely to happen.

Keep the coachee’s comfort in mind, too. An action that feels comfortable to you as the coach may not feel comfortable to the coachee.

Useful will questions include:

• What have you resolved will be the best action for you?
• By when are you going to do it?
• How committed are you to this action? Can you do more?
• How will I know you are progressing, and what are the metrics of success?

Remember that you cannot manage what you cannot measure. Measurements show whether the coaching session has been successful.

Don’t Skip the Follow-Through

A good GROW conversation does not end when the options are chosen. Plan when the action will happen and set the control points where you will check progress against the expected result. The next coaching session should be decided by both you and the coachee, because coaching is a disciplined conversation scheduled ahead of time.

Then document the conversation: the highlights, the lowlights, the action points, the progress, and your recommendations. Documentation records the progress and the actions, and it shows that work is actually being done. Beyond that:

• Encourage the coachee to keep a learning log.
• Get feedback from stakeholders and tie coaching to the performance expected from the coachee.
• Provide encouragement and feedback. As a coach, be the champion of your coachee, and that means being a cheerleader, not just being there.

An employee dialog form can hold all of this in one place: the goal as a KPI, whether it is on track, the difficulties, the options, the way forward, and the agreement on performance and next steps.

Put the GROW Model into Practice

To become a good coach, focus on transformation rather than transaction. And remember: there is no transformation if there is no work done with the transaction.

Ready to practice the full GROW conversation, with the sample questions for each step and the employee dialog form? Enroll in Coaching Skills for Managers: GROW Model & Employee Dialog on Udemy. Have a question first? Please contact us.